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Saturday, November 26, 2011

My Gym Mixtape

Anyone who knows me knows that I’m a total gym nut. To the point where people have just started straight up calling me “Jim” for a nickname - I fuckin’ love it, gets me juiced! And besides the fact that I go to the gym at least 4 times a day, you can’t maintain a rock-hard, badass body like mine without a couple of badass tunes, right?

I’m constantly switching up my gym mixtapes, but time and time again, there are always a few staples that I just can’t live without when I’m fixin’ for some high performance health. So with that said, I present to you 5 timelessly badass tunes that will always be playing on my Walkman as I continue my pursuit for fitness excellence.

Goo Goo Dolls - Iris
I’m a pretty spiritual dude and all about finding zen through my workout. In order to do so, I just slap on a little Iris, get naked, and rip a couple of curls with 5 pound aerobic weights in the mirror of the locker room. I'll bet ya dollas to donuts there’s no better pre-workout workout than this.




Foreigner – I Want To Know What Love Is
Alright Jim, I Want To Know What Love Is is on – time to get down to some business. I’m definitely feeling juiced when this song comes on and it’s when I really start striving for the burn. You better hope you’re not in my way – I’ve been known to black out when Foreigner comes on my Walkman and I accidentally once pushed a woman out of my way to get to the leg press. She went all crazy on me, but I blamed Foreigner for making such a fuckin’ kick-ass song.

Sugar Ray - Fly
This song comes on about halfway through my workout and at this point, I’m just havin’ fun wit it. Fly can be a wild card though - for what it's worth, there wasn’t a sexier song written in the 90’s than this and I never know what I’m gonna be up for when it comes on. Maybe you’ll catch me doing some dead lifts followed up by some capoeira dancing as I mosy to my next station. If I’m feeling sexy, maybe I’ll go try and chat with the chick in the leopard-print leotard at the juicer station. Or maybe I’ll just head back into the locker room for a refresher and do some more naked curls. Who knows?



Linda Ronstadt & James Ingram - Somewhere Out There
Full disclosure: I’m a Fievel guy. A lot of people think of Rocky and Hoosiers when they think of inspirational movies. Not for nothin' but, is it even an argument? Poor Fievel Mouskewitz and his family are just trying to emigrate from Russia to America in hopes to escape oppression by a cruel army of cats.

Long story short, upon the Mouskewitzes trek, Fievel gets separated from the rest of his family and winds up floating to America alone in a bottle. Once he finally washes up on American shores, he must overcome some serious challenges, including getting screwed over by Warren T. Rat and escaping an attack by a gang of cats called the Mott Street Maulers. But you think that shit’s gonna stop fuckin’ Fievel? Nay! Just when you think he’s gonna give up, he overhears Papa Mouskewitz’s violin playing – a sound so familiar to young Fievel – and in the end, it is the beacon that leads Fievel back into the arms of his family.

The reason this makes the mixtape is because I’m always tempted to give up when the burn kicks in – 5 sets of 265 lbs ain’t no game of checkers. But then I just think of Fievel, and how he didn’t give up either. And whenever that little mouse’s face pops into my thoughts, the bar gets lighter, and I get stronger.

Skip It Jingle
I think the whole muscle confusion trend is phenomenal. But I’ve taken my own approach to it. On each mixtape, I like to throw this quick, 30-second ditty in random spots throughout the playlist. And whenever it comes on, I stop whatever workout I’m doing and just do 30 seconds of skipping ‘rope. It’s a real bitch, but this song is so happy and fun, it helps take some of the pain away.


So there you have it - 5 songs I won't leave home without. Maybe they're not for everyone, but those people who aren't for them are called pussies and I don't associate with them anyways.



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