Happy Thanksgiving

I do! I do!

6 sexual torture devices for retired executives

X Affordable Sexual Torture Devices for Retired Executives

Despite what you hear, everyone likes to get a little freaky--and retired rich white guys are no exception. Actually, after years of desperately trying to fit in and keep up with the Joneses, it’s not surprising that seemingly wholesome pillars of the community are actually sexually depraved lunatics. For this growing market of retired americans looking to spice up their Sunday mornings with physical pain and submission, here are a few of the finer sexual torture devices on the market.  Nothing special or elaborate, just reliable violent sexual products at a price that any social security recipient could afford.  

The Centre Cup

Calling all history buffs! Like any red-blooded american, you’ve been dying to bring some olde timey towne square embarrassment in the form of a pillory binding structure with a sleek modern design.  And with the low purchase price, you’ll never be so proud to be ashamed! 

The Swing Shirt

Gone are the days when buying restrictive sexual clothing required driving to “mixed race” neighborhoods.  Your liberal kids aren’t lying--internet style commerce is revolutionizing the sex torture market and the swing shirt is a perfect example.  The clever stitching and popping orange color will make any sub happy despite not having the use of his arms to defend himself against a hormone-fueled violent sexual attack.  Fun “Bahama Style” colors also available!

Perfect Connextion

Although different and far more painful than the Swingshirt, this torture device reminds the sub of their lack of control by restricting all blood flow below the biceps.  The strong titanium bar and functional rubber collars provide light-weight and durability for those long nights of disgusting perversion.  

Gold Flex

Not Pictured: Eagerly Awaiting Wrinkly Ball Sac

Talk about a monkey wrench!  Penetration and full swing contact are just a few of the many great uses of this revolutionary and affordable masochistic device.  Eager subs can either bend over or spread their gross legs for a quick punch towards sexual pleasure.  

Swingrite

The futuristic SwingRite can turn any quiet night at home into a shameful and embarrassing experience for even the most aggressive and competitive executives.  With little setup or assembly, the SwingRite is a convenient and fun sex weapon that will appease even the most gluttonous of perverse appetites!

Clayton

Animals From Hell

1. The Shark – That's a real photo.  If you don't think that thing's a straight up Satan-child, then you should stop taking crazy pills.

2. The Snake – Kill every snake you ever come across in your lifetime.  If you don't, I'll assume you think AIDS is cool too.

Hop in!

3. The Hyena - Sick demon-eyes you got going there, hyena.  Who gave you those things?  Lucifer?

4. Spiders - Yea, I get it, they eat insects therefore we have less mosquitoes.  But I don't trust anything that has more than two eyes and produces a strong enough venom to kill a small horse.  Pretty sure this scene from Arachnophobia was enough to put me over the edge.

5. Eels - So there's an animal that can produce up to 600 volts of electricity.  I'm sorry, what?  We are talking about Earth here, right?  Where's Valentine McKee when you need him?

Move over Slash

Harry

Live Webcast Fail

A-Hole

Alienzzzzzz

This is a real photograph of another galaxy taken by Thomas Read.  The Independent informs us about the photo:

"The Sunflower Galaxy, by Thomas Read (UK, aged 12): Winner of the robotic scope category. A spiral system like the Milky Way, Messier 63 has arms which encircle the yellowish centre of the galaxy like the petals of a flower, earning it the nickname of the Sunflower Galaxy. This image was captured by the young photographer using the Bradford Robotic Telescope in Tenerife, which he controlled over the internet" 


So that's what another galaxy looks like, huh?  And they named it after Mark Messier?  Nice call.

Click on this link for a better look:

http://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/art/features/out-of-this-world-astronomy-photographer-of-the-year-8159658.html?action=gallery&ino=11

Mom and Dad went to a Show

Krang

Butt Rock

Animals You Don't Fuck With: Episode 2

THE PYTHON

Class: Reptilia

Location: Northern Africa and many parts of Asia

Notable Characteristic: They have been seen swimming in the ocean, and they've been known to eat nearly anything if hungry enough

Why you don't fuck with it:

The Python spawns from the deepest, darkest pits of hell, along with sharks, spiders, eels, and countless other animals that I'll eventually get to in one episode or another.  Good luck fending yourself from this slithery shitbag if you happen to cross paths with one in your unfortunate travels.  Check out the four rows of razor sharp inverted teeth, bro.  If bitten, there's no amount of squats or lat curls that could help you in stopping Mr. Deathgrip from literally squeezing the meat out of your head until you die, before swallowing you whole as it unhinges its bottom jaw.  It will slowly crush your bones as it digests you and use its insanely powerful muscles to slide you down into its belly.  Sound like fun?  Then go take a fucking safari cruise out in Asia somewhere and climb a tree.

Here's a funny video of a python eating a baby alligator alive.  Cool!

Here's another of one that ate a whole pig, while some freak-shows cut the thing open for fun.

And finally, a vid of a python that ate a whole goddamn cow.  

China may be surpassing the U.S. in global economy, but at least we ain't got 7–foot minions of Satan perusing the local neighborhoods. 

Fuck You Deval

Patrick signed into law, the "three strikes bill" this morning. I think most people understand what this is. California tried under the govenator and totally fucked up their entire prison system. people were getting locked up for LIFE for weed charges and DUIs.
I dunno what I'm more pissed about, this becoming a law, or the fact that Deval signed it in a "secret meeting" this morning. I didn't realize we lived in fucking Russia.

ps. Deval Patrick visited my work four months ago, and spoke about how he would never agree to pass this law. What a fucking coward. I hope you die
http://www.boston.com/metrodesk/2012/08/02/deval-patrick-signs-repeat-offender-crime-bill-private-state-house-ceremony/rjms7x4ROPh2qcGvr2unLK/story.html

Hey Jack, do you think we're going to have fun at the wedding this weekend?

Rodgers

NFL training camp starts July 26th

This guys more excited than me for football season, but I can understand where hes coming from.  I am sick of baseball already and will soon be sick of the Olympics.  While some events are watchable, its mainly just an excuse for pedder-asses to watch for a glimpse of a 14 year old girls camel toe while she rips front handsprings on the pommel horse. 

SCARY

420 Defenders - On All Fours in Heaven

Eats

Stop Comparing Me to Norway

There is no "quality of life" comparison to be made about the United States and some Scandinavian country with the racial diversity of a lacrosse game.

I’ve heard this argument since I was in college, but I heard it most recently on NPR from Inside Job director Charles Ferguson.  And in articles like this.  He was rambling about how the United States doesn't provide the same quality of life, infrastructure and education of countries like Sweden and Switzerland.  On paper, this may be true, but let’s apply some common sense and explain why this is total bull shit.

 

First, comparing the United States as a whole to a Scandinavian country is like comparing New York City to Concord, NH.  To make a food analogy, one city is a simmering pot of delicious mystery stew, the other is a weird-smelling white guy in hiking boots.  Norway is usually cited as having the highest quality of life. Norway is 5-fucking-million people.  5 Million.  The United States is 312 million people, which makes it some 98.4% bigger than Norway and perhaps a teensy bit harder to govern.  The commonalities between the United States and Norway are that they are both considered independent sovereign nations, and nothing else.  Different populations, priorities, economies, problems, resources, goals, responsibilities, and overall existences.  I wonder how Norway corrects their centuries of discrimination towards minorities and assimilates the constant influx of new cultures and immigrants into their society?  Because whatever they're doing, let's just do more of that.  Oh, right, Norway is all white guys named Sig that consider the Swedish an inferior race.  



Actually, it is the Viking's official position that
Swedes smell bad for hygeniac,
rather than genetic reasons.

It’s an unfair comparison with no substantive value outside allowing armchair liberals to downsize American accomplishments, and of course bolster that self-esteem of the historically insecure Nordic population.


The same goes for the other countries cited: The Netherlands, Finland, South Korea, Denmark, and Tawain.  It’s a competent government overseeing a small, homogeneous, loyal, and educated population.  It's like bitching at LA for not being as clean as Aspen, Colorado.  Fuck off.

YEEEEESSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!

Adios asshole!

Gigged on

Classic Keaton: Pacific Heights

Wait, what's your idea for this film? Michael Keaton as a psychopathic tenant terrorizing his 2 yuppy landlords to no end? Ruining their home and their relationship, not too mention their physical and mental well-being? Sign me up! Classic Keaton all the way. PEEP this shit.

"Don't FUCK with the Keaton"

Peek-a-Bruce

Overacting 101



Voice From The Future: "Relax, you'll realize in about 10 years from this moment that being "Guy #3" in an Adam Sandler movie is nothing to go ballistic about."



HAPPY FLAG DAY!!!

From your local pizza mogul

Animals You Don't Fuck With: Episode 1

The Nile Crocodile

Class: Reptile

Location: Most parts of Africa

Notable Characteristic: Some species have been seen swimming up to 7 miles out in the ocean.

Why you don't fuck with it:  Because they are fearless, and frequently prey on humans.  Not to mention the fact that they ambush elephants that are 8 times their size.

There is not enough money in this universe to persuade me to kayak down a river in which resides these might-as-well-be-dinosaurs that are known to hunt in packs.  But you can ask this guy what that's like.  Oh wait, no you can't because HE WAS FUCKING EATEN ALIVE BY A CROC.

Hopefully that monkey on his shoulder survived though.

Or, if that didn't scare you off from prodding one of these bad asses with a stick, you can check out this insanity that includes photos of a veterinarian in Taiwan who GOT HIS FUCKING ARM RIPPED OFF AT THE FOREARM BY ONE.  Someone had to shoot the the croc twice in the neck in order for it to release the dude's arm.  It's cool though, because according to zoo officials, "The crocodile was unharmed, as we didn't find any bullet holes on its hide."

Oh.  Really?  Bullets to the neck of this thing doesn't even put a dent in its hide?  Neat.  Makes me feel real safe knowing that this carnivorous lizard tank is chillin' in the weeds somewhere on our planet.  At least I'm on a different continent.

Don't fuck with the NILE CROC.  Respect.

Public swearing outlawed in Massachusetts town

Give me a FUCKING break Middleborough.
Words can't describe how much I can't fucking stand obnoxious soccer moms with nothing better to do than pass anti-swearing legislation. It's the same cuntbags that press charges against middle school kids for for giving their dorky son a nut shot. Cause it's not like there's anything else going on in the world. People aren't hacking each other to pieces in Syria or anything.
No one dies from swearing, not to mention that it's protected by our FIRST fucking amendment. So shut the fuck up you America-hating communist BITCH!


Happy Summer Olympics!

Koala Kid

Radiohead: Pts. 1, 2, and 3

My past week was a Radiohead binge.  One night in Boston, and two nights in New Jersey/NYC.

I think of Radiohead, who they are, what they've done, the things they've refused to do, and I begin to feel engulfed in an uproar of feelings.  Though, of all the feelings that arise, there is always one that ultimately trumps them all, and that is gratuity.

I've been following this band for so long, that at this point in my life, they are the only band that I truly "follow" anymore in a sense of that word.  Previous curiosities have always left me in wonder about even the most minute of activities of a select few bands of my ever-so-brief lifetime.  Namely, Pearl Jam, Modest Mouse, Built to Spill, and it wouldn't be fair for the Strokes to be absent from that list as well.  I have bought not one of the four aforementioned bands' most recent album.

But for the last two Radiohead albums, which the band gave away for free, I paid $10 for each of them.

Presently, I find myself asking the question, "Why would I do that?"  I don't buy albums anymore.  And I sure as hell know that Radiohead don't need the money.

So just what the heck is it that makes Radiohead so special?

Well the answer is rather quite simple, it is the answer to why I haven't bought the last Pearl Jam, Strokes, Built to Spill, or Modest Mouse records, and it will always be the universal answer as to why people will support an artist:

Because of the quality of the art being created.

And for Radiohead, they have been crafting relevant high quality art for the most uncanny length of time.  They are beginning to travel down a road that very few other artists have traveled.  It's probably safe to say that most people would agree that Radiohead's first great album was The Bends.  So between then and their most recent King of Limbs, we're talking the time period between 1995 - 2012.

That's seventeen years of mastery.  Do you realize just how unprecedented that is in music today?  Actually come to think of it, fuck just today, how about ever in the history of music?  How many other artists can you name me that have come close to that?  The Beatles were only around as a band for 8 years of recording time (although I'm pretty sure they could have done it forever if they wanted to).  You can't convince me that the Rolling Stones were making good records through the late seventies.  The only person I can think of who we can draw parallels to is Michael Jackson.

(On a side note, one might raise the argument that not all of the albums that Radiohead have made over the past seventeen years are of high quality, to which I would dispute that there are over 30 million people on this planet who would disagree with you, and that has to count for something in an argument such as the one I'm making considering we're talking about a subjective topic here.  Not to mention the fact that they sold those 30 million records having only one "big" radio hit in "Creep").

It was chillingly interesting to hear Mike McCready speak about his fear of losing his creativity in Pearl Jam's standout Single Video Thoery DVD (about the 8:30 mark), which I find notably coincidental considering that documentary was for Yield, what I consider to be their last good album.  I'd wager that musicians think about that more often than they would like to admit, and there were certainly moments when the future of Radiohead was a huge question mark in the public's eye as to whether they would or could ever release another record of such high artistic modern pertinence.  But they did, and, amazingly, they continue to do so.

In "Giving Up the Ghost" Thom Yorke couldn't be more accurate when he claims that "life seems impossible".  Everything had to happen at exactly the right time, in just the right format for all we know to have come into existence, which has always made me feel so fortunate to simply be, to have an existence in this ever precious journey we're all on.  And it always makes me happy to think that I get that about life, because I don't think that everyone comes around to realizing that in their lifetime.  Likewise, that, in a nutshell, describes how I feel about your band, Thom.  Everything in its right place.  I feel so thankful that I'm here with those I love, with you and the ones you love, and you've been able to share with all of us the great things that Radiohead has brought into this world.

So while over the last few nights, as I partook in the gentle washing of your "Separator" lyrics over and over us through the microphone, "If you think this is over then you're wrong", after all these years, I will reply that you couldn't be more right.

Thank you.

Wait Just A Minute Here...

Mom of face-eating attacker says: 'He was no zombie'

So your trying to tell me this guy IS NOT a zombie? Cause eating someone's face sounds a lot like a zombie activity to me.  Fucking walkers are everywhere!

Someone needs to call Rick!

Radiohead Week.

ANYTHING's POSSIBLE!

One Talentless Unemployed Millionaire I Actually Feel Bad For

My god, look at that monster.  Please meet Alexa Ray Joel, the daughter of Billy Joel and Christie Brinkley.  This was perhaps the biggest coin flip for physical DNA in the history of the world. Prior to her birth, a bodiless soul wandered around heaven wondering whether it's phsyical earth vehicle would be tall beautiful Brinkley or sad piano-toad Billy Joel.  I imagine a craps game that plays out like the following:

Soul: "C'mon Brinkley, gimme some Brinkley!  Anything but those creepy toad eyes!!"...Rolls dice

Dealer: "Joel eyes.  Craps."

Soul: [uncontrolled sobbing]

Based on her self-serving wikipedia page, it seems young Alexa has also followed her father's career path (not that following her mother's was really an option).  Her debut EP, Sketches, was met with much hilarity from fans and critics alike.  In 2009 she tried to overdose on fake ibuprofen, but a doctor told her it was impossible to do so because fake ibuprofen has no active ingredient.  This traumatic experience should provide some great song-writing pain, and I can't wait for her follow up to Sketches.  Alexa is also the face of Prell shampoo--which probably doesn't exist.  I'm surprised she hasn't signed on with a ski goggle or welder's mask company because those products could solve more problems for her.



It's hard being a talentless millionaire

Here is yet another example of some celebrity's kid that, without their parents millions, would be hanging out at some food court wearing goth clothes.

The 5 Worst Jobs I've Ever Had

As a twenty-something slave to the money-man, I’ve had a long road of questionable employment decisions and degrading positions en route to building a “resume” of “qualifications.” Here are a few miserable jobs that come to mind, in chronological order.

Holiday Retail Associate - Hanover Mall KB Toys - 2000

This was my first real job, I applied for it the day I got my license.  No idea why, just decided that KB toys might be a good place to work because some kid in my spanish class worked there and he wasn’t a bad guy.  I quickly learned that the job had its perks--scoping babes at the food court, stuffing generic PS1 memory cartridges in my pocket while my dickhead boss  listened to Linkin Park in the “breakroom,” and drinking the only candy sold in the store (which always came in non-solid form). But it wasn’t all fun and misdemeanors.  First, the fucking KB Toys Christmas mix played on repeat.  When you’re spending eight hours of a saturday stocking shelves and answering question about something called X Box that doesn’t come out for two more years,  the last thing you want to hear is “Santa Baby” for the seventh time.  Second, this time period was the apex of Captain Morgan consumption.   I distinctly remember coming into work feeling like a spiced rum and sugar zombie covered in McDonald’s breakfast sandwich residue.  Between my own breath, the smell of mall retail, and the average physical attractiveness of my full-adult colleagues--I usually pledged sobriety until the following weekend.  Third, there was a leadership coup just after Thanksgiving where the easy-going Kate was replaced by the Iron-fisted Eric, and my shenanigans were no longer accepted, and I moved on. 

God Hates Christmas

Notable Tweets

 
@Jose Canseco, 9 hours ago...

"America is not ready for someone like me I tell you the truth right to your face everytime and you can't handle it you weak mortals"


Whooooooaaaaa, wait a minute now, Jose.   Are you telling me we've got to endure your muscles and non punctuated tweets for the rest of eternity?!  Sweet Jesus.


Well shit, I might be mortal, and I'm sure as hell weak when it comes to Canseco standards, but at least I've never let a fly ball bounce off my head for a home run in a professional baseball game in front of thousands of viewers.

The Burr Man

If you're gonna wheel around a murse/breifcase in the city.....

Get the fuck outta my way on the sidewalk or at least pick it up and carry it you pussy.

The Korean Zombie

Do you like the movie Bloodsport?  Did you play Tekken or Street Fighter back in the day?

Then stop wasting any time and get into MMA.  Why?  Because it's the real life version of all of those things and it's ten million times more interesting than any boxing match could hope to be these days.

This dude Chan Sung Jung, known as "The Korean Zombie", is unreal.  Ever seen a grown man tap out to a "Twister" submission where the upper half of your body is pulled in the opposite direction of your lower half?

Take it away, Rogan...

Eat Shit Other 49

Massachusetts is the best state in the union. By Mark Vanhoenacker | Posted Monday, May 14, 2012, at 6:00 AM ET | Posted Monday, May 14, 2012, at 6:00 AM ET

Slate.com

Don’t Mess with Massachusetts

It may be everyone’s punching bag, but it’s time to face facts: The Bay State is best.

 

Massachusetts, in today’s political culture, is more epithet than state. The People’s Republic, Taxachusetts, “Sweden”—this is America’s arugula-munching, maple syrup-swigging, receding-ponytail hippy uncle, exiled to its cold, lonely corner of American geography by Sunbelt population growth and a rightward-leaning national discourse. That “Spirit of America” license plate doth protest too much. For much of the country, Massachusetts, if not actually un-American, is the suspicious redoubt of the American left.

As a native, I’m willing to take it on the chin for the state’s crimes against the republic: certain unfortunate regional accents, the term wicked, and that image of Michael Dukakis in a tank . For the state’s affection for happy-clappy bumper stickers (“no one is free when others are oppressed”) and the drivers my brother calls “Massholes”—I apologize.

Still, all the Bay State-baiting can get depressing. Especially in the recent primary season, as Mitt Romney, pummeled by charges of “Massachusetts moderate,” has run far from the state he once governed. Et tu, Mitt?

On the brighter side, though, Gov. Romney’s candidacy is an opportunity to take a closer look at the state that dare not speak its name. Through all the red mist and flying blue fur this election year, it’s worth reminding voters of a truth Romney probably won’t be emphasizing: The nation’s favorite punching bag is an exceptionally successful state.

Let’s compare Massachusetts to its peers on three basic measures of success: education, social well-being, and economic strength. Some Americans believe good results on these metrics are the goals of responsible government, and others believe they’re the happy consequences of free markets. But however we get there, these are desirable outcomes for all Americans.

First up is education, the foundation of America’s meritocratic values and the key to whatever success the country will find in a globalized, knowledge-based economy. Massachusetts is renowned for its higher-education institutions. Less well known, though, is that the home of the original Tea Party also has the best schools in the country. On the most basic measures of educational achievement—fourth- and eighth-grade math and reading skills—Massachusetts tops the nation.

Education Week’s Quality Counts 2012 report expands on this success. On their overall index, Massachusetts ranks second, to Maryland. But on two of the index’s most important measures of results—a lifetime educational Chance for Success index, and a K-12 Achievement index that bundles metrics such as test results, year-on-year improvement, and the gap between poor and wealthier kids (perhaps the truest test of our fabled meritocracy)—the Bay State again leads the nation.

And most of the world. According to a 2011 Harvard study, while reading proficiency in Mississippi is comparable to Russia or Bulgaria, Massachusetts performs more like Singapore, Japan, or South Korea. Often better: Massachusetts students rank fifth in the world in reading, lapping Singapore and Japan, and needless to say, every state in the union. In math, Massachusetts slots in a global ninth, ahead of Japan and Germany. (Some international educational studies rank Shanghai and Hong Kong as separate countries; if this wasn’t done, Massachusetts would likely rank two places higher.)

What about social well-being? Above all, we want kids to have a healthy start in life. According to the Kaiser Family Foundation, Massachusetts has the nation’s highest level of first-trimester prenatal care, and the third-lowest infant mortality rate (Virginia, Pennsylvania, and Missouri are about 50 percent higher). It also has the second-highest rate of child access to both medical and dental care, the nation’s lowest child mortality rate, and the lowest teen death rate.

It goes without saying that Massachusetts has the lowest percentage of uninsured residents—5 percent (Thanks Mitt! Mitt? You there, Mitt?), compared to 16 percent nationally, and a whopping 25 percent in Texas. On life expectancy, Massachusetts ties for sixth-highest, about five years longer than the worst-performing states. In another political universe far, far away, you might describe a place like this as pro-life.

A few other metrics of social well-being: The Bay State has the second-lowest teen birth rate, the fourth-lowest suicide rate, and the lowest traffic fatality rate. The birthplace of Dunkin’ Donuts has the sixth-lowest obesity rate. And depending on the source, the first state to legalize gay marriage has either the lowest or one of the very lowest divorce rates in the country.

Finally, let’s take a purely dollars-and-cents look at Massachusetts. No matter where you start on the political spectrum, this is the most important question, because many Americans believe we must choose between social investments and a competitive economy. So what economic sacrifices is Massachusetts making to achieve such extraordinary educational and social outcomes?

None, apparently. Massachusetts has the second-highest per capita personal income among the states. Unemployment in March was 6.5 percent, well below the national 8.2 percent. Its state per-capita GDP ranks sixth-highest. Its median household income (a measure of widely-distributed income) is fifth.

Massachusetts is looking particularly sharp when it comes to the globalized, tech-driven economy on which America’s superpower standing hinges. According to a 2011 report, Massachusetts has the highest per-capita venture capital, patents, and technology licensing of 10 leading high-tech states. Worker productivity in Massachusetts (GDP per employed person) is the third-highest in the world. And research and development spending as a share of GDP in Massachusetts is higher than any country anywhere.

Massachusetts is as green as it is high-tech, and recently displaced California as the nation’s most energy-efficient state. No surprise, then, that the Kauffman Foundation put Massachusetts at the top of its New Economy Index. More surprising, perhaps, is CNBC’s index of America’s top states for business. This is a calculus so ruthlessly focused on corporate competitiveness that it marked states down for high union membership. Massachusetts came in sixth. Not bad for the People’s Republic.

All this isn’t to suggest that the Bay State doesn’t have problems. While the state is among the lowest for property crime, it ranks considerably worse on violent crime. On a recent corruption index, it ranked 13th—nice, but not A-list. Its unemployment figure handily beats the national number, but 14 states do better. And, what you’ve all been wondering about: Massachusetts has high taxes, though perhaps not as lofty as reputed. It ranks 11th-highest (and at 10 percent, only barely above the national average of 9.8 percent).

It’s also worth noting that there are many ways to cut the statistical cake. Massachusetts’ second-lowest teen birth rate, for example, may reflect a higher abortion rate (though one that’s still below the national figure). The low traffic deaths may be due to the molasses-like flow of traffic on the state’s notorious roadways. And the marvelously low divorce rate is paired with a below-average marriage rate.

The most compelling retort, though, is that Massachusetts is simply a rich state, so of course it has good schools and health care. To address this, I contacted Kristen Lewis, co-director of Measure of America, a project of the Social Science Research Council. Their American Human Development Index weaves health, education, and income metrics into a quick summary of a state’s well-being. Connecticut ranks first and Massachusetts second. (Anyone interested in exploring the state of their state will love these beautiful interactive maps.)

So, what of the charge that good outcomes result from high incomes? Lewis says “you might turn the question on its head” and ask, instead, why is Massachusetts so rich? “Massachusetts and others at top of the index tend to make significant public and private investments in the ingredients of well-being,” explains Lewis. Ultimately, these investments pay off both socially and economically. She points out that Maryland is third on Measure of America’s income index, but 33rd in life expectancy. Virginia comes in 6th on income (right behind Massachusetts), but 11th on education, and 25th on health.

So high income is no guarantee of good social outcomes and strong investments in people clearly haven’t punished one of our wealthiest and most globally competitive state economies. In fact, if America wants to be a healthy, smart, rich, globalized, high-tech powerhouse, we arguably have no better model than Massachusetts.

For many, a steady drizzle of mockery for the state and its “moderates” is the only response to that uncomfortable truth. Still, it’s hard not to dream of a presidential campaign in which a former governor would run on, not from, his associations with Massachusetts. Dukakis, of course, ran on a “Massachusetts Miracle.” But Gov. Romney is already too far from home for that, and probably knows better than to try.

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Welcome: The Newest Residents of Dedham! The Nobles!!

Yahoo Headlines Kill Me

Mitt Romney apologizes for the ‘dumb things’ he did in prep school

PostsEmail By Dylan Stableford | The Ticket – 5 hrs ago

Who's Next?

Everyone knows celebs die in three, so who's next?

Im thinking...
But hoping for...

In all seriousness though, MCA was the  man and Beastie Boys are fucking awesome. I just pray Mike D and Ad-Rock don't shit all over MCA's grave by replacing him with some dickhead like Eminem and go on a money grubbing world tour. please, please dont.

R.I.P. MCA

I've never been a big fan of the Beastie Boys.  But I find myself being more sad than I expected about the passing of MCA as I watch old Beasties clips.  A giant underdog of the music industry, for sure.  Probably never got and never will get the credit he deserves for the part he played in changing the game.

5 Year Disapointment

I wasnt expecting much from the The Five Year Engagement going into it, but the previews looked decent, and Jason Segal & Co. typically produce a quality product. Unfortunately I made a mistake, and will never get those 130 minutes of my life back. This movie suuuuuuucked. Two problems, It's not funny and waaaay too long.
1. Dear Jason Segal, your bare ass isnt funny anymore. The first couple times you whipped your dick out on camera was hilarious, but now its just old and kinda sad. Your body looks like an albino beluga with melanoma. You need to see a doctor about your skin tags.
2. When are people going to learn the golden rule of comedies? LESS IS MORE! When was the last time you saw a 2hr+ comedy that was funny? Never. No comedy should ever go over 90mins, EVER.


D+ (Probably an F if the chick in it wasnt so hot)

The Abomination

Are you fucking kidding me with this shit, Francis?  This? After the first 2?  I hadn't watched the Godfather movies in a while, and then they were on AMC on repeat for a week.  Apparently the 40th anniversary of the original. I actually advise going back and watching the Parts 1 and 2 every five years or so, because they are NASTY.  I completely forgot how epic they were. They contain everything you want in an all-time great film.  But then, they come out with this bullshit?  Fucking Joe Montegna running around like an idiot?  Absolute travesty.  Biggest abomination since Alia Atreides popped out on Arrakis.

Side Note:  I know Pacino's a bit of a joke now, but go back and watch Godfather part II. Unbelievable performance as Michael Corleone. Guy used to be an incredible actor.